Alsatian Cousin is a song interpreted by Morrissey, released on the album Viva Hate in 1988.

Alsatian Cousin lyrics

Were you and he lovers?
And would you say so if you were?
On a forecourt, on a Friday
Passing my way
Ohh ohh ohh

Were you and he lovers?
And if you were, then say that you were
On a groundsheet
Under canvas with your tent flap
Open wide

A note upon his desk
'P.S. bring me home and have me'
Leather elbows on a tweed coat, oh
Is that the best you can do?

So came his reply
"But on the desk is where I want you"
So I ask even though I know
Oh, were you and he lovers?

Oh oh ahh ah ah ah ah ah
Ah ah ah ah ah ah
Ahh ah ah